Adam: Head assassin
Ashley- Damsel in distress
Naseem- Adam's crazy sidekick
Once upon a time....
In a land far far away, where the drama virgins, ninjas, and jedi-masters roamed and frolicked freely in the school zone of Micollef Acting Academy, a terrible thing happened. One day, when Adam, Ashley, and Naseem were walking home together, some psychotic maniac jumped out of the bushes, leaped at them, grabbed Ashley, and began to run. It is then that our story starts...
Adam: WHAT THE FUCK YOU GOD DAMN SONOFABITCH?!?!?! YOU JUST STOLE MY WOMAN! NOBODY LAYS A FINGER ON HER! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
With that, Adam ran at the man carrying his beloved angel away. Meanwhile, Naseem kept walking, oblivious to what was happening, because she, of course, had her music on and was drawing in her notebook. Then she realized that Adam and Ashley weren't walking with her anymore. She was forced to put a stop to the music she was playing. Then she saw Adam tackling a big, fat guy holding Ashley. Ashley, being the un-sissy girl she is, was beating the crap out of the guy, screaming at him and kicking him and calling him naughty names.
Suddenly the guy disappeared, and Adam fell to the ground, beating up the dirt
Naseem: What the hell just happened?
Adam: That god damn motherfucker stole Ashley!
Naseem: *gasping* I bet it was the communist penguins! Again!
Adam: *also gasping* I bet you're right! Why are you always right Naseem?
Naseem: It's the way I was made *smiles and puts on her music again*
Adam: Well, you know what this means...
Naseem: Huh? I can't hear you!
Adam: I SAID YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!
Naseem: I STILL CANT HEAR YOU!
Adam: I SAID YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!!! *rips off Naseems headphones*
Naseem: Um. Food?
Adam: NO! Its Anti-Communist Penguin time!
Naseem: Oh!
So Naseem and Adam change to ACP (anti communist penguin) mode, with their underwear on their heads (clean of course, because it was magical), bazooka guns, donuts, and magic drama powers. (see, you all just wish you could be like us!)
Adam: *taking out his handy dandy pilot planner* So computer, where are our arch nemesises now?
Computer: Their precise location is in a Taco Bell
Adam and Naseem: Taco Bell?
Well there was only one Taco Bell in whatever place they were in, so they went to the Taco Bell.
Naseem: Why is everyone giving weird looks?
Adam: Because we have underwear on our heads, duh.
Naseem: Where could Shlee be?
Adam: I dunno. Lets check the kitchen
So Adam and Naseem went back into the kitchen, where they found Shlee and a group of communist penguins dangling her over a batch of hot sauce. It was the fire kind, because they noticed all the little ripped packages on the floor. Naseem knew that a single drop to Ashleys skin would kill her (dont ask how she knew, she just did). Naseem sent telepathic messages to Adam (thank god for thought speak) and she devised a plan (because shes smart as hell).
Naseem: *sighing loudly and being dramatic* Well Adam, it looks like we cant rescue Ashley huh? OH WELL! *wink wink, nudge nudge*
Adam: Oh yeah, too bad! Oh well, lets go!!
So Adam and Naseem go.
Then they come back. Naseem is armed with a huge fishing net, and Adam kills all the communist penguins with his super drama ninja powers (his bazooka was just for looks) Adam accidentally hits the rope that is holding Ashley, and she begins falling towards the vat of sauce. Naseem uses the fishing net to catch her, and they saved Ashley.
Ashley: Oh my god you guys thank you! Stupid communist penguins!
Adam: Youre welcome my dearest. Care for a treat?
Ashley: *dreamily* Id love to split a Mexican pizza with you.
Adam: Your wish is my command! *starts to leave arm in arm with Ashley, then stops*
Wanna come along? Theres enough pizza for 3!
Naseem: Eh, no. Ill stay here and listen to my music.
So Adam and Ashley run off, get married, and are blessed with free Mexican pizzas. And Naseem stayed in the kitchen of Taco Bell, listening to music forever. Eventually she got married to Derek, and then they listened to music forever until they both died. The end
